One of our crew may be going to the big house for a little while. We are a badass #NorthWesternOntario paint-flingin', sawdust-spewing, papier-mache sodden #ArtCrew . We so bad that American Fishermen steal our sculptures and make sweet, sordid BronzeBack love to them... and bad touch... and abandon them to the tender mercies of predawn #FortFrances .
Rain is too humid for paper.
Glass loves rain, however. Glass in your windows, glass in your car, glass in your hand.
We are so badass; we have puppets that fly to Mars and reenact "1984". But not at the same time. Yet. Our puppet budget and technology is slightly above "pathetic and weak". Quality control is exercised by smelling the puppets. We have people for that.
Wayne And Shuster : Swan Lake Murders
This is the sketch comedy that I grew up with, in Red Lake, Ontario. One of Frank Shuster's family members created Superman. Johnny Wayne was my only hero, for a while; in the time of a boy.
Part 1
Part 2
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A Sudden Noise. Close.
There was a quickly amplifying sound of car engine? brakes? then two "crumps", the unmistakeable bass and screech of quickly-folding metal.
"Holy shit!", so says we all.
Out the door, already punching 911. Z. and others fly, converge.
I speak to the operator, listen to an eyewitness and offer directives to the emergent heroes, slithering in and out the pickup window. Doesn't look like she stole anything, but I can't be sure.
"Do NOT move him."
"Turn off the engines."
Engines, engines.
"How many vehicles?" she said.
"Multi-vehicle. At least three."
"Where's the driver of that car?"
Dead, dead. Fucking dead.
In a tree, or somebody's flowerbox...
NOT in the car.
Shit. Not parts... please not parts.
"Do NOT move that guy!"
Distant siren.
Just one driver? Two parked cars? No bystanders?
Holy shit.
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I heard that he was all over the road, prior to the crash.
Bad throttle cable? Stroke? Marinated? Forget where the brake was?
Folks from the UNFC were amongst the first on scene, rendering assistance. The driver plowed into two cars parked in front of the building.
{Update; July 27, 1:40 am: The artwork mentioned below has been found and is on its way back. Thanks to the good folks of #FortFrances , the #mocassintelegraph and #FortFrancesUnderground . New #ZzorhnAndBingoRage podcast added to posting.}
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I forgot to include these thoughts with the previous posting. Mars could be terraformed, quick and dirty, by crashing an asteroid or comet into its northern polar cap. What?...
Mars is small. The whole planet is just wider than the distance from the Earth's surface to the centre of its core. Because it is so small, Mars couldn't retain its formative primal heat or generate enough of its own nuclear heat to maintain a moving, molten core. No core, no planetary dynamo generating an overall planetary magnetic field. No magnetic field and the atmosphere gets stripped into space, leaving the surface dry, cold and irradiated.
I propose to "partially-terraform Mars, with a single-event". I would prefer to crash a large comet -rather than an asteroid- into the northern polar cap of Mars, for two reasons: 1)It is more likely to break up and form an airburst in the thin atmosphere than an asteroid and 2)it would bring its own payload of water, CO2 and organic molecules to this desert island. I'll try not to hit the NASA probe on the cap.
Our choice of airburst, only a few kilometres above the surface, will vaporise a significant portion of the current "Martian ice age". This event will fill the atmosphere with enough water vapour and carbon dioxide to kickstart greenhouse warming on Mars, increase surface air pressure, reduce radiation load and -hopefully- restart a hydrologic cycle. Surface water and precipitation will help neutralise and wash out the soils, as well as eliminate global dust storms. Alas, this miracle may be a temporary Eden. The atmosphere will begin to leak into space, immediately, unprotected by the gravity and magnetic field that we currently enjoy. The question is, how long would it last, if it were thick enough to be dynamic, warm and wet?
50 years may be enough to provide humanity with an emergency raft in the face of global evacuation.
What could we do in 50 years? What could a planet do in 50 years? At the very least, we ought to be able to engineer another bolide strike on one of the ice caps. If a successful greenhouse effect can be sustained, however, the atmosphere may just mine the caps for water and CO2 for us, offsetting the erosion of the solar wind and gravity leakage. Then what? Have I created an engine to burn off another planet's life support resources? Cool. Don't worry, people will be more moral and responsible in a hundred years; they'll figure it out. Maybe we can restart the core by detonating zillions of nukes down boreholes.
Mars can probably defend itself. If the human parasite manages to establish a foothold on Mars, it is likely fated to be a temporary visitor. There is probably an extant biome buried on Mars, lurking in ices, aquifers and deep atmospheric pools. It will bloom if the atmosphere is jumpstarted, and will certainly be hostile, without malice.
200 years from now:
We survived the jump to Mars. We are thriving; gardening in the Martian soil has been accomplished and the enhanced atmosphere is currently self sustaining. Cannibalism is shockingly common and everybody is sprouting extra fingers. We are more comfortable inside, of course, but the kids run around without suits and mock the sluggish. The sock puppets left us generations ago, sailing across the sea... begging us never to follow them.
#ZzorhnAndBingoRage are revered as pioneers and heroes, receiving full pardons and election to the #RoyalOrderOfMars . #Canada is no longer a country, but is revered as a good start.
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{July 26. Sculpture found, abandoned. But, taken care of and returned, by community.}
I am sorry to end a funny entry with a bummer note, but one of my best sculptures was stolen from the back of my pickup truck last night. The ShovelMask was a combination of Whitetailed-deer antlers, #papiermache head, snowshovel neck/body, oil-clay and acrylic paintjob.
One of my favourite works and crowd favourite at shows.
I had left my vehicle parked at #StudioChezZzorhn with the box rolltop closed and tailgate closed, but no locks. Someone eased it open and pulled the piece, easing the tailgate partially shut afterward. I discovered the theft when the tailgate fell open as I drove away the next afternoon.
Help me spread the news and let the thieves know that I need the artwork back. I have very little and it represents a significant investment of time and effort. You can contact the local paper at http://www.fftimes.com/ , send social media messages to #Canada #art networks, put up stolen artwork posters (please pass this info. to friends and family and strangers in Fort frances - Rainy River District). I can't afford a reward, but agree to not "get medieval on your ass", etc. if you return the artwork. Please be careful with it. Yes, feel bad, but don't use that as an excuse to destroy it, please. Thank you.
It's most likely still in town, in the moist, pasty hands of some local scum, but could have been taken by pne of those slick American Fishermen in town for the pro Bass tourney. There's no telling what lurid practices they are employing upon the innocent acrylic skin of my child. My art-child. Brain/mind-baby.
Send $1500.00 to Eric C. Keast...
c/o Northern Lights Credit Union
601 Mowat Avenue
Fort Frances, Ontario, Canada
P9A 1Z2
to assuage your guilt and/or
sponsor the #ZzorhnAndBingoRage Show
and/or to commission a new canvas, etc.
So. The last chapter of #ELE420 ended with the destruction of the moon and the beginning of the journey to Mars. Even with our advanced technology, it will still be a month-long trip in the good ship "Lollipop". Neila has made a strong move, however, sabotaging the big red buttons; the ship won't last out the hour, as things are.
Our regiment of handpicked "moral-responsibility"-trained spacebitch repopulation volunteers is reeling from the revelation that they have to service the engineers, as well as the other human repopulation volunteers.
Eric, the self-appointed captain is reeling from apparent hallucinations; terrifying visitations by a creepy, tiny, pointy, scaly, overtouchy little pervert.
Zzorhn is suffering from occasional bouts of Turkish language and spacebitch scheduling conflicts.
Z, built and painted the spaceship by himself, with some design input and detailing from Eric. I photographed the model from several angles against a dark green sheet and was able to create our "launch videos" and moon landscapes integrating the ZABR-"Lollipop".
Fiddling with the brightness and colour controls made it easier to make the "greenscreen" effect. A brighter, more uniformly coloured sheet would probably work better, but cost money. :P
The ship was hung with clear monofilament labelled "invisible thread", suspended by hook-screws in my ceiling.
Update March 24, 2012. Early a.m. - Another Miss LoonTrout video added to end of post. New vid includes explanation of the Mayan calendar.
This painting has been around a while, but it keeps getting better:
"Miss LoonTrout Got A Crappy BoobJob,
Mr. & Mrs. CrackPenguin
Pull Their Tired, Old William Tell Routine,
Nanabush Is Alive, And In The World."
It was in storage for a couple years at Definitely Superior Art Gallery in Thunder Bay; then again for the last year, in the back of the studio.
I have been working on new canvases for most of this winter's painting, but lately I got the bug to take another look at some existing works. Nothing is ever done, while it's in the studio.
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My most recent video with Miss LoonTrout; sock puppet interpretation of the Jay Mohr podcast, Mohr Stories #35, and a promo for our upcoming #ZzorhnAndBingoRage show.
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March 2006, old BingoRage studio.
Used papier-mache technique to secure mask to canvas, on 1"x4" boxframe.
This paper cast had one other "brother", that was sold separately , as a wall-hanging, blue clownmask.
It was not as creepy as you might imagine.
First paint on the "Miss LoonTrout..." canvas.
It looks so nice and uncluttered.
Simple.
Nanabush still has two, healthy antlers, strongly attached to his head. This imagery is a recurring motif in my work, taken from rock art and shamanic traditions around the world. The human figure portrayed with horns or a "halo", to denote wisdom and power.
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This next video documents the process of "bead-embroidering" the "ghost" into the early LoonTrout canvas.
By July 2007, all the major parts were in place (except background-fishey, just added).
Irregular concentric rings ripple out from Nanabush, as he strides through our reality, like the ripples in the pond as he strides through the shallows.
The doorway, from which the bead-ghost entered the reality of the painting is much better defined at this point.
The Turtle figure is still prominent, upside-down in the upper right quadrant (under LoonTrout's left wing).
Nanabush's right antler is now busted.
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This is how the canvas looked, as it was displayed at the
DefSup Art Gallery, NOCAA-10 show
(Northwest Ontario Contemporary Aboriginal Artists - 10)
winter 2008-2009.
Very, very bright. I had used a white spray paint to highlight the mask and needed to cover it up with alotta green.
UFO is more dimensional and Nanabush's third eye has appeared.
---
This is how the piece looks today, after I have been tweaking it for the last week.
All the characters have gone through visual upgrades.
Turtle is all but completely gone, replaced by a new character, the vertical background fish.
Vertical, background fish arose from a conversation with my friend Toshie and his dreams of surfcasting...
so, it must be a dream-striper.
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The whole painting is a pile of chaos:
Damage by circumstance, bad decisions, survival by chance and the skin of our teeth.
The CrackPenguins are depicted running "their tired, old William Tell routine"; a grim drinking game.
It is based upon the "accidental" shooting of William S. Burroughs wife, down in mexico, famously portrayed in the David Cronenberg film, Naked Lunch.
The "Crack-Penguin" is a personal trickster-figure of mine. You just can't trust a penguin, they're always trying to ingratiate themselves.
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The LoonTrout character cuts quite a figure.
It must have been a strange set of circumstances that allowed the pairing of a Trout and a Loon; natural enemies.
You would think that growing up in a blended household and overcoming certain self-loathings would have innoculated Miss loonTrout from the ravages of advertising...
But, no. She, too, has gone under the knife.
Probably a cutrate, back-alley-type cutter.
The UFO, in the background, now makes more visual sense as it attacks an "old-timey" police car, rather than the little stick figures that I had put there, fleeing, before. Happier UFO, happier artist.
---
Nanabush and his advising angels.
There appears to be some sort of moral arguement going on.
Nanabush seems to be in rather high spirits. At least for a trickster, who's had to tear-off his own right antler. Medical reasons, or what?
---
This piece is available as a sponsorship opportunity for Spirit Fire Park. We are installing the paper "Sturgeon Mama" statue in the park this summer and would like to build a roof to shelter it from the worst weather, as well as new muralwall infrastructure.
Purchase this sponsorship opportunity for $20 000:
- Receive the "Miss LoonTrout..." canvas, or have it sent to the museum/library/etc. of your choice
- Have a new mural installed at Spirit Fire Park, in your name, your business name or loved one' memory.
- Build a shelter for the "Sturgeon Mama" statue.
Yes. That is a bunch of clams.
If you haven't got it, please spread the word and pass this on to any rich relative or the notorious art patron in your life.
Forward, tweet, blog, pod, etc.
Thanks.
:Eric
"Miss LoonTrout - evolution" video; with Mayan calendar explanation.
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(Updated Oct.14, 2011: Sponsorship details added, below.
Oct.15: minor edits, pic moved and title change, Returning viewers, please note sponsorship package notation.)
There are three grown men in the room, actively ignoring me while I try to ask them some serious questions. Nuts and bolts -type questions about game mechanics and battle strategy of "World of Warcraft". They are speaking aloud to each other, gesturing and making grand grunting noises occasionally.
It's Alliance vs. Horde, baby.
There are other grown men, grown women, children and perhaps bots on this battlefield, from all over the world. My acquaintances are being attacked by an emergent army of different species, genders, "classes" and levels. This particular battleground pits 15 enemies against our side's 15; I lose track of who is winning and how. I think that this war battle may be timed, but I am not sure. My friend's character stands on a hill, defending some flag while his team is getting their ass kicked somewhere else. I feel distinct hostility from the group as he answers my questions and encourages me to walk around in his skin as the others continue to get beat down, mano a monster. We win, somehow. The guys compare their stats and brag about their "damage per second", etc..
Later, we refought the battle of Normandy in WOW fashion; a tall ship has docked and is spilling attackers onto the pier. Our side play the allegorical German gunners, as we rain havoc with steampunk/magic cannon on the seaside. [Parabolic laser-tracer sights.] We retreat inland and upwards as chugging siege engines follow. Eventually, there is no higher ground to fall back to. Afterwards, our guys attack from the shore in a reversal of roles; the time difference to the "objective" determining the winner. One of our players falls into a hole on the dock and is stuck for the entirety of the attack. He can't even kill himself and rejoin the fight.
We're waiting for the next battle to start, wandering around some medieval village comparing companion animals and "mounts", etc. One guy can summon a troupe of Scottish Highland dancers, but is saddened to admit that they can't be summoned in battle.
There is loose talk of fishing, "grinding", foodstuffs, trading and manufacture "in-game" as we wait out the "11 minute average wait-time". An ominous theme plays through the speakers as we are summoned to the dungeon.
"Everybody stay together"
"Eat that fish before we go any further"
"10 seconds..."
...
"Is that a Boss?" (I say)
"No, that's garbage." (A doorman, of sorts.)
"Somebody pulled!" Evidently "pulling" is bad, because our group is buried in an avalanche of hideous critters.
"Tanks are supposed to pull, but this Tank blows."
I wonder, aloud, why they can't attack with their mounts. "What's the point of riding a Raptor (dino) or a Dragon if you can't attack with it?" All present agree with me.
"Is that a Boss?"
"That... is a Boss."
It looks like a gigantic-metallic-grim-reaper-demon-arthropod wielding a battle-axe the size of a bus.
"My guild got hacked once... we saw a character going back and forth to a mailbox... robbed us blind."
"Tank's not going to like that you're pulling all the attention."
My notes end at this point. Much fun was had by all, then they went out dancing.
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Please be forewarned: The following podcast contains adult language, sulky muttering and poorly thought-out arguements.
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SFP Sculptural Sponsorship Opportunity
These pics show the last big change to the Sturgeon Mama sculptural model, moving the pelvic fins back and lower on the body; a more realistic position. I have striven to make the proportions of this piece realistic, while employing a stylised representation of the fish's body.
The sturgeon has become more realistically proportioned and anatomically corrected as the modeling evolved. The process is further documented in a previous BingoRage posting (photos and video).
Paper copies of this piece will be available for purchase (profits supporting BingoRage Studio and Spirit Fire Park)Papier-mache replicas of the "Sturgeon Mama" will be available in "plain paper"/finish-at-home form, or finished by #BingoRageStudio; available in hanging, wall-mount or floor mount.
We are also looking for someone to sponsor a bronze casting/installation at Spirit Fire Park, which will also provide us with the means to offer residencies to regional artists and expand our "canvas" footprint at the park.
Proposed Sponsorship Project at Spirit Fire Park: The "Sturgeon Mama" Installation.
A large, gravid Sturgeon swims over exposed bedrock ridges and between the Aspen, sinking towards the forest floor's forage; Bronze back glints amongst the Balsams as distant train whistle blows.
The Ontario Arts Council funded our inaugural season as a public artpark, generously supporting the building of our multipurpose muralwall, paper mask-making for our theatre space and sculpture creation for installation in the park. The sculpting of the foam/clay sculpture model "Sturgeon Mama" is a direct result of that OAC Northern Arts project.
With this sponsorship project, we would like to fund: 1) the creation of a rubber and plaster negative mold, 2) wax positive casts of the fish's form, 3) plaster investments and ceramic shells for the wax segments, 4) casting, fabrication and "finishing" of the bronze sculpture, 5) delivery and installation of the mounted and finished bronze, [subtotal: $ 110 000]
6) 4 artist residencies at Spirit Fire Park over the next two years [subtotal :$ 20 000]
7) ongoing BingoRage studiowork and 8) continuing infrastructure development and maintenance at the park. [subtotal: $ 50 000]
Total sponsorship package: $ 180 000 (N.B. - Subject to change if the price of copper skyrockets + any applicable taxes/duty/etc.)
The "Sturgeon Mama" will be available for private purchase, after we fund the rubber and plaster mold-making process; currently at $ 95 000 (N.B. - plus delivery and installation + any applicable taxes/duty/etc.).
* It is important to note that individual destinations and installation requirements need to be addressed and funded budgeted separately from the casting/fabrication/finishing process.
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We are particularly excited at the opportunity of enabling and encouraging regional arts-community development in NW Ontario.
Please pass this sponsorship opportunity along if you know someone looking for large fish sculpture, riverside-park installation needs, memorial plaques in their name, money spilling out of their pockets, etc.
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It's been a busy Autumn and Winter, BingoRagers. I'd spent less time in my own bed, this Fall, than in irregular squats, kitschy rustic cabins, sister’s kids’ room floor, a posh hotel, a friend’s attic and crappy crunchy convex cabin cots. There had also been changings of routines and sleep cycles that mimics the comic jetlag of the stereotype jetsetting, harried business professional. I have been on a very productive painting swing... when back at home.
The "Reptile Brain" model {right hemisphere} in foam and clay.
The boys from Anurag Art took me duck-hunting in the famous Lake of the Woods. The weather was unseasonably warm, keeping us from seeing the great Northern flocks, but many of the local puddle ducks were still available on our first expedition. The second trip got us into one very exciting morning on a backwater beaver pond. We had to hike over an old, dry floodplain and beaverdam to access the further pond, nearly three metres above the main lake level.
Zach, Teal and wonderdoggy, Oshky.
I served a very tasty duck dinner for deercamp, this year. Stuffed with celery, walnuts, onions and salt; glazed with orange juice concentrate.
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The boys encouraged me to finish a sculptural piece for them to mold and cast. The new bronze piece is tentatively titled "Reptile Brain", the model formerly known as "Windigo Skull Evolution" [previous posting].
The Foam / clay model with rubber / plaster "negative" formed around it. The clay dams hold and form the rubber as it flows and cures.
We are going to cast five pieces as a limited edition for private purchase, one piece for artist proofs and one casting for sponsorship attribution and public installation at Spirit Fire Park. I would like to sell the sponsorship project before private purchases, so that we may reimburse the Bronze gods for their advance preparation, but private buyers for individual castings are welcome.
Cost considerations include bronze ingot "market price", fixed studio and foundry fees for casting and fabricating the Bronze element of the sculpture and non-fixed (yet) costs for: base material and fabrication, site-specific installation requirements, landscape planning, transportation and actual installation particulars. Those costs can outweigh the metal, depending on where and how the piece is to be exhibited.
Chief decider and ship's captain at Anurag Art, Bill Cole.
Bill gestures and grunts, in the direction of rubber mold; perhaps indicating thirst or hunger.
This sculpture can be installed inside or outside, alone or in conjunction with other sculptural elements. Long-term installation is recommended; "mobile/short-term is possible. BVA offers the following SFP sponsorship costs projection as a baseline reference. Costs for other installations will vary, by circumstance.
Please forward, blog, tweet, etc.
Especially if you have corporate chums needing to sponsor some cultural stuff, or friends with casinos...
I was prepared to accept that and keep surfing, but noticed that paleontologist Paul Sereno is quoted with a skeptical flavour:
"While definitely a fossil, I cannot say what it is. I do not definitively see teeth. There is some bone texture, but other areas look double-layered, unlike typical cranial bone," Sereno told Discovery News.
It was then, that the gears in my head began to turn.
Marble is a highly metamorphic marine-based sedimentary rock. Could a fossil skull survive the metamorphic process of marble formation?
If it is a fossil skull, but not a dinosaur, then what? Whale, mosasaur, fish? How old is the marble? (about 190 million years old).
If it is not a skull, then what is it? A random and highly convoluted twist of inclusionary silica, sawn at a fortunate angle when freed from a mountainside in Switzerland? If it had been cut, one inch up or down the presumptive vertical axis of the "skull", would it disappear in the winding tangle of whitish veins, like buried porcelain turbulence?
I am convinced that it is an actual fossil. It is a testament to the great time and history that the piece has endured that the fracture in the marble has torn the feature in half, by twisting it such as one may tear a French baguette.
Unlike the proverbial jesus-inna-slice-a-burnt-toast, a putative dino-skull-inna-church-slab is not just a matter of personal interpretation and faith, but can be confirmed with observation and evidence. CTscans, excavation (traditional paleontological specimen preparation), MRI, matching this piece with the "second cross-section" fragment mentioned in the article.
While at duck camp, I continued to work on the clay and foam model that was the basis of the halloween Windigo Skull, papier-mache cast. It eventually turned into the piece that I left with the guys at Anurag... "Windigo Skull Evolution". I added the subtitle "primitif/modern/reptile", to the video clip.
Many ducks were had this fall; less so than if the bad weather had arrived when it should. Deer camp was hobbled by the unseasonably warm weather, as the deer felt no impetus to move in the non-frigid morning, nor frolic with lusty intent. I did work on a little clay model study, which I will post, later.
Bingo-Rage was an inside joke between my Mum and I. She was a diehard, loyal bingo player who passed away a few years ago. Her jones wasn`t the multimillion dollar jackpots bleeding Las Vegas dry, it was the insatiable $50 inside square and the lascivious, yet demure thousand dollar jackpot.
I could always tell when she had missed a big pot; holding onto a card that only needed two more numbers, when the ballcount was only at 36. Or, some such compelling position. She then watched twenty-two balls dance by, sometimes right next door; but fail to light on her stoop. She was steamed.
I smile and declare ``another clear, cut case of Bingo Rage. Tut, tut...``
That earned a harumph and we would run our post-Bingo routine: analysis of the night`s lineup and remembrances of triumphs past.
Unless noted; ideas, images, pics and text are creations of Eric C. Keast / BingoRage Studio (formerly Broken Vulture Art). Clear link to BingoRage.com w/ "Bingorage" in link text fills my standard for Creative Commons attribution.
No commercial use without informing and paying the artist, thank you. :)
